The Beatles sang ‘All You Need is Love’ but to love or not to love, that is the question? When we are hurt and a relationship ends, often the thought of ever loving someone again or being loved may seem like an impossible dream, is this true for you?
We all crave love in our lives, though sometimes love can be painful and that can create fear of ever loving again. We are stuck between a rock and a hard place, uncertain of the future, unsure of our lovability or even our capacity to love again.
We may beat ourselves up and say things like ‘when will I learn to trust my instincts he/she was wrong for me from the start’ , we may berate ourselves and tell ourselves ‘I’m stupid to have ever trusted again’, we might wonder ‘what am I doing wrong?’and ‘why do I keep attracting the same type of partner?’ We might feel hopeless about love and relationships and steer clear of forming new ones based on past experiences and fear that the past will repeat itself again.
- How much of the 86,400 seconds in your day is taken up worrying, anguishing and thinking about love and relationships?
- How much thought and air time do you give to talking about love when things go bad?
- How do your thoughts affect you physically, emotionally, spiritually?
- Does love despair spill over into your working life?
- What’s the cost of keeping hold of the thoughts and feelings about love and relationships that you may be having right now?
- What are you willing to change?
- What actions can you take that would make you feel better than you do right now?
- How will you know when you’ve worked through your love and relationship problems and feel ready to love again?
- What will that look like, feel like, sound like for you?
- If you were to focus on what is possible in terms of love and relationships and you took actions to implement all that can be, how would your life be different?
- Need some help in getting started?
As a love and relationship expert, many of my clients say ‘how long will it take to get over this?’ My answer is, it’s different for each and every person. When a relationship ends, it is always an opportunity for careful exploration of ‘the self’ and what may contribute to making the wrong choices from the start.
When you look inside and work though the things that may have contributed to love and relationship problems, well that’s the best relationship investment you will ever make. Instead of looking outside of ourselves for love, acceptance, approval and a sense of self, it’s Important to do the ‘inner work’ and explore how we each operate in and out of a love relationship.
Find YOU, Find LOVE http://goo.gl/crnvoZ is my first book about love and relationships and focuses on the relationship you have with yourself. It’s a workbook full of practical exercises and techniques that help you explore your past and what may be contributing to love and relationship problems for you right now.
There is a full love and relationship inventory in the book, or you can download here for free http://www.wendyfry.com/resources Use the inventory to gather the information that will help you work through your love and relationship beliefs.
You may need some support after completing the inventory to work towards transforming past doubts and future fears, though in doing so, you will gain a greater sense of self and in turn be confident that who you are is lovable regardless of the past circumstances and events that will have shaped you life up to now.
If you’d like to work with me in person in Surrey or over Skype, please do make contact to discover how The Spotlight Process and EFT (The Emotional Freedom Technique) can get you back on track. If you need some 1-2-1 support and guidance please do contact me direct to see how I can be of support to you via http://www.wendyfry.com
Still learning about Love? If you want to take control of your future, resolve the past and make the rest of your life the best of your life. Choose Find YOU, Find LOVE, in doing so you will find yourself, an endless fountain of love and joy that you may not have even been aware of.