26 Oct

Doing the things you don’t want to do, with great love

When was the last time you did something you really didn’t want to do?

This past week I’ve found myself doing things I don’t want to do. I’ve been reacting to things outside of my control and found myself in moments of uncertainty and having the make decisions as best I can based on the knowledge I’ve had in that moment.

We can’t plan everything…

Life being the roller-coaster that it is, we have to navigate our way through the ups and downs it brings. There may be moments we are laughing our heads off and at other times reaching for the sick bag and wanting to get off the ride.

Change as we all know is part of life, a process of natural development, learning and letting go, evolving and moving towards self actualising.  Sometimes it’s easy at other times coming out of the other side of fear, because it’s unknown seems like an impossible task.

I’ve decided to enable myself to get through doing the things I don’t want to do, but need to be done, I’m going to do those things with great love.  I invite you to do the same.

love in the sky-223859_1280 (2)

So if today, because it’s  Monday morning and back to work for many, if you really don’t feel like getting out of bed and going to a job that simply pays the bills, how would it be to seize the day, enjoy the journey to work, be loving and kind towards your co-workers, smile at a stranger, love what you do because it does pay the bills, provides food and shelter, safety and living a higher standard of life that many may not be blessed with.

If there is a person you do not normally enjoy interactions with who you will see this week, take love with you into the conversation and notice what changes.

If you’re fed up with doing your family’s laundry, washing the dishes, walking the dog and preparing meals, just take a moment and reflect on the love of having a family to care for and decide to do those tasks with great love, you will feel happier for it.

Today is not a day of my choosing. You will have or have already experienced  those kinds of days too.

There are go places I don’t want to go and things I never imagined I will have to do which need doing. I know I will have some moments of surrealism and uncertainty though I know when I do the things I don’t want to do, with great love, I will get though and so will you.

heart-570962_1280 (2)

Do the things you think you can’t, they will make you ever stronger on the roller coaster of life x 

 

 

 

18 Oct

Why Crying is Good For You…

When was the last time you had a good cry?

crying-572342_1920 (2)

It never ceases to amaze me how someone crying might make others feel uncomfortable. They might rush in saying things like:

  • Don’t cry
  • Pull yourself together
  • Don’t let anyone see you crying
  • It’s weak to cry
  • Don’t get upset

As children we may have been told things like:

  • Don’t be a cry baby
  • Be a big a big boy/girl
  • Grow-up
  • Pansy and other inappropriate name calling
  • You’re pathetic
  • Stop snivelling

It’s not long before we internalise all these negative messages and beliefs about why we shouldn’t cry!

The truth is our bodies are designed to release stress and build up of toxins through the secretion of tears.  It’s actually healthy to cry.

Perhaps you have found a way to keep a ‘stiff upper lip’ on your feelings keeping everything in, or maybe you are like me when you are in shock or deeply saddened, you too might shed a bucket load of tears.

If we continually keep emotions in we might find ourselves ‘imploding’ and this continual build up of stress and unexpressed emotions might lead to depression, low mood, sleeplessness, anxiety and a whole host of symptoms where the body tries other ways to release the build up of emotions.

Feeling like we can’t express ourselves in the moment we might also find ourselves exploding in anger and rage at the most inappropriate time.

When you next cry and someone tells you not to, it might be interesting to ask them ”what is it about my tears, that makes you uncomfortable?”

eye-609987_1920 (2)

Your tears, upset and emotions may well evoke in someone else the unresolved emotions they have not released, triggering off their own sadness, loss, grief, anger and the full range of human emotions that we all experience.

There is a lovely scientific study right here if you’re interested in finding out more about the different types of tears and why it’s healthy to release emotional tears.

In my work as a therapist, I have seen grown men, women and children cry.  In our work together, they are given the space and freedom to cry , encouraged to express the emotions that have been held in and allowed to vent what they are feeling.  Often the unresolved emotions go as far back as childhood when they were fist told not to cry.

There are a range of techniques I offer to aid emotional release though right here in this moment, the first step to coming to tems with how you feel is to join me in saying aloud.

  • I give myself permission to feel what I’m feeling
  • It’s okay for me to have these emotions
  • I allow myself to work through what I’m feeling

girl-863686_1920 (2)

Whenever your emotions surface unexpectedly repeat these statements to see you through, grab yourself some soft tissues and allow yourself to cry.

If you need a safe space to work through what you’re feeling, a place where you will be heard and supported I welcome you to make contact.  I offer a range of support programmes to suit your individual needs.

If you need help in coming to terms with love and relationships contact me here 

For general therapeutic support you can find out more here 

Remember crying is good for you. 

As ever, from my heart to yours with love,

X Wendy

11 Oct

Seeing is Believing!

What’s your personal vision for the future in positive terms?

How will you know when you’ve achieved it?

What will it look like, sound like, feel like?

personal vision 2 general support horizontal

I love using a ‘Personal Vision Exercise’ when I’m working with clients. When they are in their heads trying to analyse what it is they want and why and think things through rationally they are using conscious mind.

Left too long to our own devices, bogged down with the how’s we run the risk of staying stay stuck where we are and nothing changes.

It’s out creative subconscious mind which loves to make pictures, to see visions materialise, the artist of our dreams, the creator of our reality.   Unconscious mind is expansive  and limitless.

Imagine what you can create using your mind to it’s fullest potential…

You might like to try the personal vision exercise for yourself.

  • Take a whole bunch of magazines, holiday brochures, newspapers, guides, flyers and anything which has a picture on which makes you feel good and what you want as part of your future
  • Cut out key words or write your own in and also collect anything which represents your goal as already being achieved
  • Arrange your layout in a way that feels right for you
  • You can then glue into a journal, create a vision board or apply to the inside of a clip frame or make a poster of your personal vision and goal achievement
  • Making just five minutes a day to look at your personal vision, seeing really is believing.  What your mind conceives, it can believe and it will achieve!
  • Using this process you activate all senses, sight, sound, smell, taste and feelings.  Imagine turning up a dial of your senses and getting them off the scale to really experience the joy of achieving your goals at a cellular level

Seeing really is believing.  What you choose to focus on expands.  You will find what you focus on showing up in your life more and more.

So be sure to focus on the good stuff!

If it’s health, wealth, love, success, happiness or something else entirely, make this your personal vision for your future.  It will be time well spent!

Need a hand in getting started?  I’d be happy to work with you to achieve your goals.  Check out my services here

If you’d like specific support in the area of love and relationships check out the free resources and make contact when you’re ready to get to the heat of your love and relationship problems.

06 Oct

Matrix Reimprinting EFT Online Summit 2015: 12 Ways You Can Heal Yourself and Help Others to do the Same

Whether you know about EFT or Tapping or any of the multitude of Energy Psychology methods, you will definitely want to check out this FREE online event.  Sign up here

Screenshot 2015-10-06 08.59.23

The Matrix Reimprinting EFT World Summit October 19 – 24, 2015

Presents twelve different lessons from top trainers in EFT and Matrix Reimprinting.

  • The Alchemy of Prosperity
  • Rewiring Your Brain with Matrix Reimprinting
  • Beyond Fight, Flight, and Freeze
  • Secret Patterns of Attachment
  • Heal Your Birth, Heal Your Life
  • Clearing Ancestral and Generational Trauma
  • Transforming a Life Lived with Serious Disease
  • Beyond Grief
  • Creativity in the Matrix
  • Finding Romantic Love with Matrix Reimprinting
  • Realizing Your Dreams

The presenters will be bringing their experience in EFT techniques and practical knowledge and application of these 12 ways through which to sharpen your skills and achieve your full potential, personally and in your business.

The Matrix Reimprinting EFT World Summit 2015

October 5:  Karl Dawson (creator of Matrix Reimprinting EFT) 
October 8:  Bruce Lipton, PhD 
October 11:  Rollin McCraty, PhD 
October 14:  Rupert Sheldrake, PhD 
October 17:  Robert Scaer, MD

Screenshot 2015-10-06 08.58.27
Summit Week is October 19-24

I’m delighted to be presenting on Saturday 24th Talking about The Spotlight Process as well as Finding Love 

Screenshot 2015-10-05 22.15.29

If you know something or nothing about Matrix reimprinting and EFT this free summit is for you. I guarantee you will learn so much!

Matrix reimprinting transforms lives you can read further about this wonderful technique here 

Karl Dawson & Kate Marillat authors of Transform Your Beliefs, Transform Your Life I’m the one in the middle very pleased with myself for getting a signed copy and also the privilege to contribute the the chapter on Body Image in the book

2 of my favourite people

We look forward to connecting and sharing with you.  Sign up here

Why, because healing and transformation starts NOW! 

05 Oct

Do Your Relationships Need an Overhaul?

Working in the area of relationships all too often people contact me at their wits end not knowing what to do. They are fraught, upset, angry, scared and often feel very alone in trying to work out their next steps.

When speaking to their nearest and dearest in the hope to make sense of it all,  they get opinions, judgements and advice which really isn’t helpful and often further compounds the problem.

Emotions are a record of the past

Perhaps you too can remember a time when an important relationship wasn’t working,  when you didn’t know which way to turn, or indeed maybe right now you need a helping hand to guide you through understanding your relationships if they are not as you wish them to be.

Whether it be ‘significant other’ love relationships, family relationships, work relationships or indeed friendships there are times when the relationship as it is isn’t working and may well need an overhaul.

As much as we may want others to change, the change may well start with you!

Check out the free love and relationship inventory here

It’s all too easy to blame others for not meeting our needs though as adults we can take responsibility for meeting many of those needs ourselves.  Maybe we’ve never been taught how to stand on our own two feet and if you’re still carrying unmet needs from childhood you have no blueprint of managing yourself and project those needs out into your relationships.

The past few weeks I’ve been planning my new book which will feature specifically, the conflicting relationships between mother and daughter relationships.

I’ve decided to write it for daughters as my client base is mostly woman who have relationship problems which, when traced back often stem from unmet needs in childhood where their mothers have been physically or emotionally unavailable for whatever reason.

Any emotions and feelings not acknowledged in childhood

There is never any blame here towards your parents or caregivers, it’s often insightful to learn how far back down the time line unmet needs go.  Societal changes, changes in parenting styles, relationships ending, illness, global events, changes to living circumstances, schooling, your circle of influence and that of your parents, all play a part in whether or not your emotional and physical needs were met.

The good news is, unmet needs from childhood can be understood, worked through and as the adult you are now, you can re-parent yourself and give to yourself the loving relationship you may never have experienced. 

When working with my clients our aim is to get you to a place where you can meet your own needs. see the free self love inventory here for guidance.

Regardless of external events whether they go the way you want them to or not, you stay whole in your connectedness to yourself.  You remain complete in your love-ability.  You parent yourself in times of distress and uncertainty and most of all you remember who you are is so worth loving.

If you ever wondered whether there was a limit pg 177

Need a helping hand to guide you through  check out the range of services I offer to suit your needs.

From my heart to yours with love

x Wendy

cropped jpeg of logo