19 Sep

The Power of Words

Whether it be the words you think or those you speak, sing, write or withhold all words have power and carry an energetic vibration….

On waking or sleeping the words you think or say aloud often set the tone for your day or the depth of your sleep.  What you say in haste without thinking may cut someone to the core and the words you say with love stick in your nearest and dearest hearts and minds forever.

Once you have learnt the alphabet everything you read or hear is a combination of those twenty six letters and who would have thought those 26 letters could have such power?

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I’ve been thinking a lot about words recently as i’m in the process of writing my second book which by the way is a lot of words.

As well as my own dialogue i’ve been thinking about strangers words, communications from people I know, those shown on media or spoken on TV as well as listening to the words of those whom I esteem to.  The impact words have on us is huge.  The emotional charge of what we hear and speak as well as the physiological feelings experienced when we hear words of criticism or words of praise can last a lifetime and indeed create limiting beliefs based on the meanings we have placed on the words we have heard.

You may have heard about the experiment carried out by Dr Masaru Emoto on Water Molecule Experiment which indicates words are very much alive and contain both positive and negative energy vibration.

On searching for a suitable graphic to post with this blog typing in the search engine ‘words’, I was able to select graphics on stress, anxiety, anger, terrorism, fear, hate and love, (it was interesting to note my own thought reaction and physical response on viewing) you can guess where my focus was when you see this post.

Whatever we feel in any given moment, guaranteed is a result of a thought related to a new experience or one in which we have felt this way before.  Words, just like energy attract.  If we feel loved, appreciated, accepted and respected in any given moment because of what someone has said it’s likely the love bucket and good feeling file starts to overflow.   If words are said in anger it’s likely our filing cabinet or hard drive of all the times someone has shown anger will do a quick search and pull up all the files before we can say ‘hey presto!’ we are down the swanny without a paddle thinking about all the injustices in the world.

So..today and every day, reach for the words which give you a higher feeling thought and keep going from there.  Raise your vibration using those 26 little letters and take your focus to joy, love, happiness, calm, contentment and connection.  Talking of which, thank you for connecting with me here today.

Oh and remember the words you think are like having a bad case of the farts, if you are angry everyone gets a stink of it and the same way if your vibration is on joy (even though they don’t really smell of roses) you might find the seat next to you on the tube is always taken, random people talk to you and smile, you make friends easily and the right circumstances and people show up in your life.

Words have power!  Choose them wisely.

From my heart to yours with love x

ohh…and here just for you feel free to download the free chapter on Beliefs from my first book Find YOU, Find LOVE, simply add your details to the pop up box which loads after a few seconds and begin exploring where your limiting beliefs  and self-sabotage comes from.  Chances are they don’t even belong to you but based on the words spoken to you from way back when.

 

16 Jul

You’ve Always Had the Power My Dear

For those of you familiar with Glinda The Good Witch from the Wizard of Oz, these words of affirmation will be familiar to you.

Judy Garland playing Dorothy, lost in an unfamiliar land doesn’t believe she will find her way back home.  Have you ever felt like Dorothy alone, uncertain, lost or fearful and unsure which direction to head in?

Maybe you’ve not been lucky enough to find a yellow brick road meet a Tin Man, A Lion, a Straw Man or a Wizard along the way or had the love of a ‘Toto’, Dorothy’s pet dog on your journey so far,  though the good news is beliefs can be changed and you no longer need to feel limited in what’s possible for you.

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A limiting belief is a mental block stored in your mind which reduces your ability to achieve any goals you may set for yourself.  You will unconsciously organise your actions and behaviour depending on your beliefs, your beliefs are guiding principles and maps of how you make sense of the world.  Some of your beliefs are not true and are simply thoughts that lead to your learnt behaviour and responses to people and events.

A limiting belief is a repetitive, habitual thought that you may think over and over and over again.  Until you question your limiting beliefs, you may think that they are true and for this reason often your beliefs may come true, your limiting beliefs may act as self fulfilling prophecies even if the thought is undesirable.

Your limiting beliefs create your perception, through self talk and the internal dialogue that you run inside your head.  You can talk yourself into doing or not doing something and what you believe influences your behaviour and performance.

You may find yourself staying in the safety of your comfort zone if a belief creates F E A R (False Evidence Appearing Real).

Look carefully and you will see that a limiting belief is nothing more than a thought that you believe to be true. The word ‘beLIEf’ itself includes the word LIE and until we explore our beliefs, perceptions and judgments, we will not be aware of what lies we have been telling ourselves that are no longer helpful.

Whatever has been stopping you from finding your yellow brick road up to now can be changed.  When you change the way you think, you change the way you feel. Download your free chapter all about limiting beliefs right here and make those all important changes.

You can listen to Glenda The Good Witch having a conversation with Dorothy about realising she had the power all along right here 

You’ve always had the power My Dear ~ Use it wisely, Dorothy, Glinda and the munchkins will be proud of you!

04 Jul

Missing Events – Making up for lost time

When you think of your past, what was it you wanted you didn’t receive?

Was it the love from another, a promotion, recognition from someone important to you, being included in a group, praise for a job well done or simply feeling accepted for who you are?

Each of us crave different things, often it comes down to the need for love, acceptance, approval or oneness.

Any emotions and feelings not acknowledged in childhood

In my work as a therapist many of my clients talk about the things which happened in their lives which they regret. They tell the story of the disappointments, unfairness, heartbreak, despair and the beliefs they formed about themselves, the world around them and/or other people.

It’s true our past events do affect us until we resolve them but how often do we talk about the missing events and how to heal the past by creating a new way of thinking?

Until I discovered Matrix Reimprinting (you can read more about it here In Karl Dawson and Sasha Allenby’s first book on the subject) Matrix Reimprinting Using EFT: Rewrite Your Past, Transform Your Future, I too had many missing events from my past and many limiting beliefs which were ruining my life.

The beauty of Matrix Reimprinting is you can go back to a time in your past when you formed limiting beliefs such as ‘i’m not good enough’, ‘pretty enough’, ‘slim enough’, ‘worthy enough’, ‘lovable enough’ etc and work with your ECHO (Energetic Consciousness Hologram) otherwise known as your inner child who formed these limiting beliefs.

A little like re-writing a story, working in the matrix gives you the freedom to go back, make up for lost time and say or do what you didn’t say within the  remembered event giving the younger you the power to change your experience of that time.  Although you can’t actually change the past you can go back to the memory of when you formed a limiting belief, learn why you put it in place and clear the energy which remains utilising EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) you can even put in a new ending and take your inner child off in a whole new direction with a fresh and empowering belief which serves you.  There is so much freedom in doing this and life takes on new meaning.

At the age of fifteen, I formed the belief ‘I not lovable’, it was on reflection a misguided belief which came from my father leaving my mother but at the time I took this as a personal rejection, this played out in my life and shaped the outcome of my relationships spanning over 20 years, expecting those I had relationships with to leave or abandon me.  I’ve written about it here in my first book Find YOU Find LOVE.  Which includes EFT to clear the past as well as The Spotlight Process to help you monitor your thoughts, beliefs and how to change them.

Thinking about what it is you want to achieve in your life, what stops you?  

What are the limiting beliefs which get in your way of having loving relationships, the career or promotion you want?

What stops you trying something new?  

Who from your childhood are you still carrying resentment towards?

Which negative emotions do you suffer from the most?

Who or what triggers these emotions?

What limiting beliefs do you have about yourself?

What is preventing you from feeling more at peace with yourself? 

What else is holding you back in your life?

What is your ECHO (inner child) holding onto which still hurts you now?

What are the missing events you wish had happened?

If you were able to go back and create a new ending to an old story/event what would you do or say? 

How would changing your beliefs about yourself, others and the world around you benefit you?

I appreciate there are a lot of questions here.  You can learn more about limiting beliefs and how yours may still be influencing your current reality by downloading the free chapter here

I will continue to share in my blog how making up for lost time, using EFT and Matrix Reimprinting putting you back in control of your life.

Being aware of the past is helpful, living there isn’t.

From my heart to yours (and your ECHO) with love

x Wendy

When you’re ready to work with me you can check out your best programme here 

 

 

 

 

15 Apr

Your Past Need Not Define Your Future

How often does what’s happened in the past limit you?

Whether it’s starting a new relationship, ending one which isn’t working, changing your job or improving your health what limiting beliefs get in the way?

Do you tell yourself ‘I can’t do it’, ‘men, women, people in general can’t be trusted’, ‘I’ll never be able to manage on my own’, ‘all the good jobs are taken’, ‘I can’t keep my weight off’

Would you ever talk to a best friend like that?  Telling them they’re useless, their ideas will never work, they might as well give up?  No, I don’t think so, so why do you do this to yourself?

Back in the day when I was considering becoming a coach and NLP Practitioner I will admit I had a lot of self doubt.

My inner Gremlin which was rather like the meanest, nastiest bully.  It would tell me things such as:

  • You’re not good enough 
  • You’ll never understand it
  • There are so many others out there doing this, why would they want little ole me!

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I also had so called friends telling me:

  • There’s no money it it
  • It’s too competitive and cut throat
  • Everyone is giving up their day job and becoming a coach
  • Why would you want to give up your day job

In hindsight i know my friends were advising me as if they were in the situation, these were their fears, I didn’t need to make them mine.  I realised my own self doubts came from the past when I found it hard to understand letters and numbers and when I though everyone else was better than me.

The truth is I realised I could stay the same doing a 9-5 and not really using the gifts I naturally have or I could fly by the seat of my pants and create for myself a different future.

In the end that small voice inside got a little louder and said ‘You can do this!’ and well, that was ten years ago now.  Since that time i’ve achieved so much and helped others achieve their dreams too.

Having been someone who let the past get in the way once too often I’ve developed a process helping you to move on from the past.  It’s shared in my first book Find YOU, Find LOVE though I wanted to share some snippets with you here:

Using The Spotlight Process on the stories in your mind

From this moment on, when you get caught up in a story in your mind, please take a moment and reflect:

  • What part of your story is a replay of what happened in the past?
  • How often do you tell this story?
  • When you tell this story, how do you feel?
  • Is your story one that you are creating about the future with a negative expectation based on the past?
  • How is thinking in this way limiting you?
  • What are the consequences of thinking this way?
  • What do you want instead?

When your story is a replay from the past or is a negative projection into the future your body responds as if you are actually experiencing fear simply because you are thinking about it. The memory isn’t real though your mind and body may think it is real and project fear of attack into situations that are really quite safe.  Our unconscious mind will do everything it can to keep us safe even if there is no actual risk.  It’s a self protection mechanism.

Practical Exercise using The Spotlight Process (15 minutes)

Periodically throughout the day and at the end of each day, use The Spotlight Process to take stock of where you have spent most of your thought time (past, present or future) and answer the following questions which complement the process beautifully.

  • What have I been focusing on?
  • Where have my thoughts been (past, present future?)
  • How have I been talking to myself for the last hour or two?
  • Have I been talking to myself in a kindly way or a critical way?
  • What images, stories, thoughts or feelings have experienced today that have caused me distress?
  • Which emotions and feelings have I experienced the most today?
  • Have I been thinking about the future negatively or positively?
  • What advice can I give myself so that tomorrow is a better day?
  • What choices can I make that will take me closer to my goals?

When you use the past to work for you rather than against you, instead of responding from the part of you (the child within) conditioned by your parents or caregivers you are able to reply from the adult you.

Responding from your adult self will support you to grow, to take action and to achieve great things you desire.  Responding from the adult you, encourages you to take risks, to blossom, to treat yourself with love and kindness, to be the best that you can be.

Download your free chapter on limiting beliefs work through your demons and create for yourself a magnificent future. If you need a helping hand I offer a range of support programmes

The Past is Over

If your light is always in the past, you cannot see the future

09 Apr

Because it’s all a Matter of Trust

We’re never so vulnerable than when we trust someone – but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy ~ Walter Anderson 

  • What does trust mean to you?
  • Who or what comes to mind when you think of not trusting?
  • When has your trust been abused?
  • How hard do you find it to trust others or yourself based on past experience?
  • How will your life change when you are able to trust fully?
  • What are the benefits of trusting?

It’s been an interesting week.  On Monday I sent out a survey related to love and relationships and asked the question ‘what do you struggle with the most when it comes to relationships?’  An interesting theme emerged with over half of the respondents saying trust was their biggest issue on the other side of that was fear.

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Because the content of the survey was confidential I can’t go into the details of what was shared though we can explore further the issue of trust in general terms and it all comes down to the perceptions and beliefs we place on things.  Whether those beliefs be about men, women, people generally, organisations, government, religions etc,  it’s the meaning we place on people and events that will either make us trust or distrust.

It would probably be fair to say that those of you reading this have experienced either having your trust abused or not being trusted at some point in your life.

When it comes to trusting in love and relationships our past experiences become our filter and depending on the aspects of the past we may go on to believe our relationships will be not fulfilling, long lasting, fair or even trustworthy.  We literally take our past experience and project it into the future. I sometimes call this ‘mud slinging’.

Another example of not trusting might be a restaurant making a mistake with your bill total and charging too much.  You may never visit again or will check your bill every time you do.  You form a belief about what will happen which limits you tasting the delicious food or enjoying the ambience and good service.  You didn’t get what you expected therefore you might not trust them enough with your hard earnt cash to go back and have that extra order of garlic bread ~ with cheese! You are denying yourself of future pleasure because of a past experience.

It’s the same with relationships.  if you’ve been let down in the past by someone you trusted, it’s possible the residue of being hurt is still there for you and in new relationships you might find the need to keep checking your partner can be trusted.  This could come down to checking their social media accounts, their phone, their car and snooping on them.  As well as it being an invasion of privacy,  It really isn’t healthy to do this as you’re not trusting who you are is worth loving and you are!

growing from the past

The past need not repeat itself.  Being aware of the past is helpful but living in the past is limiting you too.  Let yourself be loved by trusting fully whatever happens, you’re still a worthwhile, beautiful and lovable person.

It’s natural to want to have the evidence you can trust someone but not trusting them or yourself is the beginning of the end.  From now on, every day look for evidence you can trust.

You can trust your alarm to go off, your kettle to boil, your body to function, your car to start, day to turn to night.  Look for evidence in your life of trust you have with others including your close friends, your colleagues who you open up to, the person at the bus stop you might tell your life story to.  Trust is everywhere, look for it, not for lack of it and more of the lovely stuff will show up.

Notice what you partner does, which indicates they can be trustednot what they don’t do.  Notice the qualities and attributes you have which make you a great catch!

Even though i’m a love and relationship consultant,  I write about this topic not from an expert point of view but through personal experience.  In my early relationships, i’ve driven people away from not trusting.  I may as well have worn the t-shirt ‘don’t come near me, I won’t trust you’.  I was my own worst enemy.

Even when significant others have told me ‘I love you’, I chose not to believe them.  I spent a good part of my life believing I wasn’t good enough, pretty enough, sexy enough etc and had the underlying belief ‘I’m not lovable’. 

Now that i’ve worked through where my abandonment issues came from i’ve been able to reflect back and understand why I wasn’t trusting and have been able to move out of fear and into love.

  • If you find yourself not trusting because you fear the past repeating itself, you’re not alone.  So many people don’t trust as it seems like a safe bet but actually you’re only limiting yourself from having an amazing relationship 
  • If you believe you’re not good enough you may even keep attracting, not good enough relationships and settling for second best.  Who you are is good enough and always has been.  The circumstances of your life need not shape your future. 
  • If you find yourself doubting your relationships will last, the doubt will creep in and grow.  Today is the first day of the rest of your life and an opportunity to build trust and in doing so create for yourself a happier future

If you really want to learn to trust again, the inner work begins with you.  I can share with you the tools and techniques which moved me from a snooping undercover detective to someone who trusts that whoever I meet whether it is on a new friendship, getting to know colleagues or investing fully in significant other relationships.  I trust totally and completely whatever I learn will be perfect for my self development.  I believe who I am is worthy and lovable regardless of what others say or do, this can be your experience too.

Who you are is so worth loving and when you trust yourself enough to believe in this the relationship you have with you and others changes.

Check out the free love and relationship resources including two audio downloads at http://www.wendyfry.com .  Be sure to download free from my website, the chapter on limiting beliefs from my first book Find You, Find LOVE  Helping you to get to the heart of your love and relationship problems.

Trust is the glue of life.  It’s the most essential ingredient of effective communication.  It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships – Stephen Covey

From my heart to yours, with love,

x Wendy

 

 

21 Mar

The Truth about Limiting Beliefs

The power of your beliefs can either limit you or set you free.

The truth is we get so comfortable with our beliefs

 

In this week’s blog we talk about understanding limiting beliefs.

What is a limiting belief?

A limiting belief is a mental block stored in your mind which limits your ability to achieve any goals you may set for yourself.   A limiting belief acts as a barrier stopping you from achieving the success you desire and deserve, not only connected with love and relationships but in fact, with many other aspects of your life.

You will unconsciously organise your actions and behaviour depending on your beliefs, your beliefs are guiding principles and maps of how you make sense of the world.  Some of your beliefs are not true and are simply thoughts that lead to your learnt behaviour and responses to people and events.

A limiting belief is a repetitive, habitual thought that you may think over and over and over again and it is my intention to guide you to discover what your negative beliefs and blocks to love and relationships might be.

Until you question your limiting beliefs, you may think that they are true and for this reason often your beliefs may come true, your limiting beliefs may act as self fulfilling prophecies even if the thought is undesirable.

Your limiting beliefs create your perception, through self talk and the internal dialogue that you run inside your head.  You can talk yourself into doing or not doing something and what you believe influences your behaviour and performance.

You may find yourself staying in the safety of your comfort zone if a belief creates F E A R (False Evidence Appearing Real).

Look carefully and you will see that a limiting belief is nothing more than a thought that you believe to be true. The word ‘beLIEf’ itself includes the word LIE and until we explore our beliefs, perceptions and judgments, we will not be aware of what lies we have been telling ourselves about love and relationships that are no longer helpful to us.

The limiting beliefs you have formed may be based on old fears, old hurts or old stories that have no relevance in the present moment.  You may be blocked within certain areas of your life because of the beliefs that you are running, these beliefs do not just influence how positive or negative a relationship will be, our limiting beliefs impact all areas of our lives.  Those beliefs will collapse the moment that you stop feeding the limiting belief and you can achieve this through the use of EFT and The Spotlight Process.

Ready to find out more about your own limiting beliefs, how to change them, get out of your own way and start living the life you know you deserve?

You can either download a free chapter on beliefs for a broader understanding and when you’re ready to take action use the techniques  to clear the past and begin to live your life with passion and purpose.

If you’d like to work with me in person to clear your limiting beliefs over Skype or face to face in Sutton, Surrey.  I have a range of programmes to suit your needs and also tailored options to meet you where you’re at.

Beliefs aren’t set in stone, you have the ability to change them now

 

28 Feb

Taking stock ~ using EFT for Emotional Freedom

In this month’s previous blog posts:

Who Else Wants Emotional Freedom

EFT for Positive Change

Transform Your Emotions Using EFT

We discovered the benefits of applying The Emotional Freedom Technique when the going gets tough.

This week I offer a lovely exercise to go through which will bring awareness to what’s holding you back in life and love, feel free to adapt the questions if you have say career conflicts, difficulties with neighbours, challenges when it comes to health or finances.

EFT can be used to clear the full range of human emotions and limiting beliefs.  

 

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Practical Exercise (15 minutes for Q&A) plus additional time to work through the underlying emotions and beliefs. 

Download your EFT Tapping Chart here and the process here

Answer the following questions and record your answers in a journal.

If as you work through the questions you feel any uncomfortable emotions coming up, apply EFT. This will support you in dissolving and resolving the emotional overwhelm you may have been carrying, related to different areas of your life and life experiences.

Be patient with yourself, and know that as long as you are tapping and using EFT to shift and change the energy around the things that have been holding you back, progress can be made.
• What negative thoughts, feelings and emotions about love and relationships do you suffer from the most?
• Who or what triggers these thoughts, feelings and emotions the most? (this could be a person, situation or a place)
• List in brief, the top ten most traumatic events that you have experienced related to love and relationships
• Who or what is holding you back from having a loving and a positive relationship?
• What is preventing you from being more loving towards yourself?
• Who from your past are you carrying any anger or resentment towards?
• What limiting negative beliefs do you have about love?
• What limiting negative beliefs do you have about relationships?
• What limiting beliefs do you have about yourself? (i.e. I’m not good enough)
• What positive and empowering beliefs would you like to have about yourself, in love and relationships instead of the above?

 

When working with clients we explore the underlying emotions to current problems.  Often what we may be reacting to in the moment is actually from a past event which felt the same.

To understand more about your limiting beliefs you can download a free chapter about his at www.wendyfry.com or invest in my first book Find YOU, Find LOVE for the full range of love and relationship respurces.

If you’d like some personal support to work through the things which are holding you back from living your life with passion and purpose.  Please do make contact with me at info@wendyfry.com and discover how my range of services, tools and techniques will support you in getting back on track to being all you can be.
Your life begins to change the day you take responsibility for it – Steve Maraboli

 

15 Feb

Emotional Freedom Technique ~ EFT for Positive Change

Over the next few weeks I take great pleasure in sharing with you the Emotional Freedom Technique, otherwise known as EFT or Tapping.

I will be sharing specifically EFT for love and relationship problems taken from my book Find YOU, Find LOVE: Get to the heart of love and relationships using EFT

Find YOU Find LOVE

In last week’s blogWho Else Wants Emotional Freedom I offered an overview of EFT though this week I will cover the history of EFT, How to use and apply it, endorsements for EFT as well as various components of EFT.

I will break it all down step by step for you, for easy reading safe in the knowledge by using this technique it will seriously change your life for the better!


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The History of Gary Craig ‘The Main Man’

Gary Craig, founder of The Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), is a very wise man.  Gary suggests with EFT to ‘’try it on everything’’   and I couldn’t agree more.  In my mind, EFT is the perfect remedy to be included in everyone’s ‘medicine cupboard’ and the good news is that it has no nasty side effects!

Gary created EFT, The Emotional Freedom Technique as an offshoot from Roger Callahan’s Thought Field Therapy (TFT).  Gary simplified the process of TFT and created EFT.  Gary understood that ‘’the cause of all negative emotions is a disruption in the body’s energy system’’ and he’s used it with thousands of people to improve their physical and emotional health.  What a legacy to leave behind, to be able to change lives for the better, using this simple technique.

I came across the emotional freedom technique many years ago when I worked for a health care provider.  Several of the therapists who were part of our network of affiliates, used EFT with their clients which had some very beneficial effects.

I became interested in this type of energy work, already being a qualified Reiki practitioner the concept appealed to me.  As I gleaned more information about this powerful technique, I wanted to learn this not only for myself but also to share with my own clients.

I have personally used EFT to work through painful childhood memories, personal limitations and beliefs and I share this technique with my clients and now you the reader to support you in working through your own challenges and setbacks.  EFT gives you the opportunity to transform and to be free from the ties that may have been binding you and keeping you stuck in the past.

What is EFT and how can I use it?

EFT is classed as an Energy Psychology.  Energy Psychology focuses on the connected relationship of energy, emotions, behaviours and health.  EFT works by shifting the brain’s electrochemistry and works by stimulating energy points on the surface of the skin.

EFT combines the principles of Chinese Medicine with modern psychology.  Our emotional and physical health depends upon the smooth flow of energy through our body’s energy meridians.  Emotions affect our energy systems and when we are tuned into a negative thought, emotion, situation or event our energy system disrupts and literally responds to the thought.

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Improving energy flow

By clearing and releasing emotional conflicts through EFT tapping, our energy system is stimulated and balances out any energy disruptions.  Our energy flow is improved, in turn our physical health and emotional wellbeing is also improved.

EFT works in a similar way to acupuncture though without the use of needles to stimulate energy flow.  EFT includes bringing awareness to emotional issues as well as physical ailments.

An acupuncturist would study more than three hundred meridian points and use a needle to stimulate energy flow. With EFT, we use our fingertips to tap gently on some of our energy meridian points/energy pathways to stimulate energy flow, transforming and releasing emotional and physical symptoms as we go.

EFT at your fingertips

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In next week’s blog I will share the EFT Tapping points with you.  We tap directly on the surface of the specific points with light and gentle tapping movements, some people may prefer to gently rub these spots if they are using EFT in a public space.  Tapping gently and stimulating these points moves the flow of energy through the entire meridian system.

Once EFT has been learnt (and it’s so easy to pick up) it can be used anywhere in any circumstance, it’s portable and very easy to master and can often reduce an emotional intensity in as little as five to ten minutes of tapping.  For some longer standing problems, several sessions and rounds of tapping may be required to reduce the emotional intensity.

There is great freedom in tapping and releasing your trapped or uneven energy flow, which has been blocked and holding you back from being open to love and loving relationships.  Persist with using EFT regularly and you will reap the benefits tenfold.

Your energy can be influenced positively or negatively by what you think about.  EFT will support you in dissolving and resolving the emotional charge connected to any memory, event or person. You can further help yourself by bringing your thinking into alignment and being aware of where your mind has been.

EFT crown

EFT can be applied to a range of emotional problems or physical symptoms.  Once you are familiar with the technique, it will support you in not only releasing negative emotions, but will also allow you to tap into those inner resources you always had but just forgot about.

EFT can be used to clear past traumas, overwhelming emotions and can also be used to increase relaxation, happiness and joy.  EFT can also be in the moment as and when a shock may occur.

It can be used to transform fears, anxieties, past events, current challenges, upsets, disagreements, physical ailments, emotional problems, relationship problems, aiding  personal healing, as well as self development, confidence building and life transformation – phew – and that’s not all!

EFT has changed my life so much for the better and my hope is that it will change yours, in ways you never imagined possible. EFT has paved the way for me to the road of freedom and amazing opportunities and I share it here with you so that you can take your own journey to all that is possible.

I hope that after reading my posts you will use EFT in your everyday life.  EFT is a technique I wish everyone knows about.  It’s so effective on many different levels.  It can be used to manage day to day life, along with those unexpected things and it may also improve your physical health and emotional wellbeing, as well as deal with past or current challenges and setbacks.

It is my wish for you, that EFT transforms your life in the way it has transformed mine and the lives of the people I have shared this valuable resource with.

What the people at the top are saying about EFT

Many self help authors, gurus and teachers endorse EFT, the word is waking up to the positive changes EFT brings and is spreading.

Louise L Hay author of You Can Heal Your Life said ‘’ When I first heard about using tapping or EFT (Emotional freedom Technique), I thought it was delightful that something this simple and easy could really work’’.

Dr Wayne Dyer recently said ‘’put away your scepticism, this really works…I’ve had great results with tapping in my own life.’’

Jack Canfield, Co-creator of Chicken Soup for the Soul, calls it ‘’the most powerful new transformational technology to come along in years.’’

I had the privilege of training as an Advanced EFT and Matrix Reimprinting Practitioner with the wonderful Karl Dawson www.efttrainingcourses.net

Karl co-authors Matrix Reimprinting Using EFT with Sasha Allenby

I’ve had the great privilege to have also contributed to his latest book Transform Your Beliefs, Transform Your Life co-authored with Kate Marillat.  Both books are excellent reads if you wish to develop your EFT toolkit.

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Your mind and body react to a continuous flow of information coming in through your senses. Every thought you think affects your body (physiology) and emotions.  Likewise every physical action affects your thinking and your mood.   Thoughts can create and heighten stress, sadness, depression as well as intensify feelings of joy, happiness and love.

I wish to encourage you to be aware from this moment on how your mind-body connection works.  Being aware of this connection, will help you to manage the ways your mind and body influence each other.  Being aware of your thoughts for even just a few minutes each day is a start.

Checking in with yourself as often as possible and monitoring your thoughts will serve you well.  When you manage your thinking to that which is more positive, or you allow your body to experience positive things such as exercise, relaxation and good health, the mind-body connection improve tenfold.

Measuring energy flow using the SUD Scale

EFT uses a scoring system to measure the depth and intensity of a problem and this scale is called SUD (Subjective Unit of Distress)   it measures on a scale of 0 – 10.

0 equates to feeling neutral and 10 equates to feeling high emotional distress.  It’s helpful as you work through various problems to measure before and after tapping, the level of distress you begin and end with.

This scale was introduced in 1969 by Joseph Wolpe.

Using this scale helps you to identify how much the problem may be affecting your physical and emotional wellbeing.

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Resolve and dissolve your problems using EFT

By making a commitment to yourself to apply EFT to work through the things that may have been holding you back in life and love, you really step into your own power in resolving and dissolving past hurts and fears.

Choosing to take personal responsibility right here and now to commit to yourself and taking responsibility for the changes that you would like in your life, is one of the best investments you will ever make. It’s through regularly working on yourself that the biggest changes occur.

EFT can be applied to any area of your life and used to transform the complete range of all emotions.  EFT has the capacity to change your life for the better, clearing the past and creating a space for the new.

I advise using EFT as soon as possible, in your everyday life.  Whenever and how frequently you use EFT is a personal choice.  You can never tap too much, only too little.

I personally use EFT as it has a positive chain reaction and works not just on one main issue but all the little connecting issues that are related to a problem.  If you have any doubt at all about whether or not to tap on problem, tap and see what comes up and what changes as a result.

As you read through my blog posts and download your free chapter on beliefs you will become aware of your old patterns, outdated behavioural responses and how you may have been unintentionally getting in your own way or blocking your own success, sabotaging love relationships without being aware of what you were doing.

We all do it at some point in our lives, unwittingly sabotage ourselves, as the fear of the unknown is greater than the fear of what is.  That is all about to change once you’ve discovered and apply EFT in your life.

I look forward to sharing more on this theme in the coming weeks with you.

For general therapeutic support check out www.bepositive.me.uk

For love and relationship support go to www.wendyfry.com 

 

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08 Feb

Who Else Wants Emotional Freedom?

There’s a lot to be said about emotional intelligence and I’m sure you have read many self-help books on the subject of emotions and how they impact your life, though what I will be sharing over the next few weeks ahead is a technique called EFT to set you free from the emotions weighing you down.  I will be sharing specifically EFT for love and relationship problems taken from my book Find YOU, Find LOVE:Get to the heart of love and relationships using EFT

Find YOU Find LOVE

I will also be talking about EFT Lorraine Whyte from Blog Talk Radio on the 18th February on her show ‘Unlock Your Soul’ I will be sure to share the link to the show with you as soon as I have it. You might like to listen to a previous interview where we talk about self love.

EFT otherwise known as ‘Tapping’ or The Emotional Freedom Technique is becoming more and more and more popular as a way to de-stress, process and release hurtful emotions as well as clearing the way for new beginnings and boosting your confidence.

EFT goes way beyond just thinking and talking about your problems, it’s a practical technique housewives, school children, racing drivers, sports professionals, singers and actors are using to either clear negative feelings or indeed ramp up the positive ones.

Whatever your age, gender, ethnic origin or beliefs EFT belongs to everyone.  We all have unwanted emotions and together we can free ourselves from the things which weigh us down.

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In my book I share the following tools and techniques:

Chapter 1: Get to the Heart of Love and Relationships Using EFT

  • What is The Emotional Freedom Technique?
  • EFT Tapping Points and Process
  • Transform Your Thoughts and Feelings Using EFT
  • Positive EFT

The weekly blogs will outline some of the content to get you started using EFT and even if you are a seasoned practitioner or have been using EFT for some time I will be sharing how to utilise the technique for the area of love and relationships.

The Emotional Freedom Technique 

I really do feel that EFT deserves a drum roll of introduction, appreciation and acknowledgement, as using it may seriously improve your emotional well-being and in turn your relationships and that, wouldn’t you agree, is worth a drum roll or three?

I don’t know anyone who doesn’t want to be free from unwanted negative emotions or who doesn’t want to improve their love and relationships or their ability to love and be loved.  There is great freedom and personal transformation that comes from using this technique and you will experience that for yourself if you follow the guidelines offered to you.

I’m hopeful that once you have learnt and applied EFT to the areas of your life you wish to work on, EFT will become as regular for you as brushing your teeth.  EFT can be compared to daily brushing to balance energy.  It can be used as ‘first aid’ and applied as and when needed in the moment.  It can also be used for long term healing and will certainly be less painful than a root canal.  When you are able to work on the root of a problem, smaller, related problems will no longer influence you to such a great effect.

EFT has the potential to change your beliefs and in turn transform your life.  You will find your life improving either in subtle ways or with dramatic effect depending on how often you apply the technique.  When you free yourself from past hurts and fears, clearing emotional baggage easily and quickly, you break old patterns and behaviours and open up for yourself a world full of love and opportunity.

EFT and the ripple effect

Many people find that using EFT on one problem, in fact resolves other problems at the same time.  As our energy shifts and changes and begins flowing freely, so our thoughts, feelings and emotions shift and change.  Life starts to look rosy again.

EFT has a ripple effect, just like casting a pebble into a still lake, the ripples of change spread out into all areas of your life.  Every ripple, every thought, every feeling, every word and every action you cast out will create and bring to you amazing life changes.

I use EFT every.  I recommend you, too, use EFT as part of your natural daily health plan to support you in balancing your emotional health and well-being.

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Take a moment to reflect and consider these questions carefully:

  • Do you want to be free from emotional ties to the past?
  • Ready to set yourself free from fear and worry?
  • Looking forward to letting go of emotional baggage weighting you down?
  • Want to feel more hopeful about the future?
  • More confident?
  • More loving?

Then join me in living your life with passion and purpose!

EFT will support you in achieving all these things and more.

Set your diary ahead to follow this blog (it goes live on Monday’s) and all will be revealed over the coming weeks.

Can’t wait to get started in getting to the heart of your love and relationship problems. You can download completely free Chapter 3 from my book ‘Love and Relationship Beliefs’ over at www.wendyfry.com  You will also find some other lovely goodies on the resources page to use at your leisure.

Serious about sorting out your love and relationship problems, take a peek at my services page here  It will be my pleasure to support you in Finding You and Finding LOVE.