Tag Archives: connection

02 Apr

Why Asking for Help is good for you

When was the last time you reached out to another person or group to ask for help?

Asking for help may come easily for some of you though for others there may be untrue beliefs around speaking up which holds you back from voicing your needs.

Here are some of the following statements clients and friends have made when it comes to asking for help, which do you resonate with?

”I can’t ask for help, i’ll look stupid”

”If I ask for help they will think i’m an idiot”

”Last time I asked for help I got shot down and was told I should know”

”If I ask for help I feel too vulnerable, I don’t want people to think i’m weak”

”Asking for help means others will judge me negatively”

”If I ask for help and he/she/they say no I will wish i’d never asked”

”I hate asking for help, it makes me feel uncomfortable and embarrassed”

”I will look like a fool is I ask for help”

”At my age I should know how to do this but I don’t, it’s harder to ask for help when you’re older”

These are just a few of the limiting beliefs and meanings placed on past experiences or future projections which can get in the way of asking for help.  By not speaking up we may never get out of our comfort zones to learn new things or give others the good fortune to help us flourish and grow as well as the opportunity for them to share knowledge and feel good about being able to do so.

Asking for help is good for you, not only does it flex your uncomfortable muscle until it’s feels more comfortable to ask, the more you ask the more likely it is you will be offered help and support.  If you don’t ask you don’t get.  Trying to do everything on your own, by yourself is not only frustrating it can be exhausting too.

Asking for help in the long run can reduce stress, give you the information that’s missing so that what was unknown becomes known and as a result the things you want to be, do and have are more likely to come to pass.

It’s time to end the struggle and ask for help….

What’ the best that can happen?

How will learning how to do something or having something done for you benefit you?

By asking, what does it give both the recipient and the giver of help an opportunity for?

When asking becomes so comfortable for you what will it give you that you don’t have now?

How will having that assist you long term? 

This week I have been asking for help with all sorts of things and getting out of my own comfort zone so far I have been offered help in setting up some new software on my PC.  Help in unblocking a drain. Support in taking my phone back to a setting which I couldn’t find.  Understanding the meanings of some health tests as well as also having the opportunity to help those who have reached out to me.

Please do join me in helping others and giving those people you ask for help the opportunity to see you grow, in doing so you help them grow too.  Together we are stronger.

When nothing is certain, everything is possible…..

 

 

 

19 Feb

For the Love of Friendship

Friends are the family we choose to have in our lives.  Those all important people who with whom to share the highs and the lows and the roller coaster we call life.

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I’m often inspired to share in my blogs, real life events and today, out of the blue was surprised by a friend popping in on the off chance to see me and boy am I pleased I was in, albeit hanging out the washing with no milk in.  Friend’s don’t care if you hair is a mess, your home in disarray and there are no posh biscuits to share, they are there for you and meet you wherever you are.

What does the word friend or friendship mean to you?  

When you think about your own special family of friends, who comes to mind?  

How long have you know each other?

What similarities and interests do you share?

How did you come to meet?

What have you been through together?

What are your happiest memories shared? 

When was the last time you shared from your heart openly that you love your friends?

What’s your next available chance to make plans to meet with your friends? 

Time can’t be banked, exchanged or extended and before you know it time will fly…

Like my friend and I, life and circumstances took us to different parts of the country, each of us doing our own thing and yet coming together as if it was just yesterday we met.   With much chin wagging, hugs, laughter and tears we were able to fill in the blanks as to just how we have been sending our time.

There’s something truly special about friends and the best way I can describe it is like having a heart centred connection which stays in place and whenever life might take you that connection is a bond never broken.

Whether it’s been a month, a year or indeed years you have been out of contact with friends, coming together to meet each other exactly where you’re each at, will bring much joy to your heart.

Reach out today and make a plan to connect and share your journey with your friends.

Time passes quickly – real friendship lasts forever…

19 Sep

The Power of Words

Whether it be the words you think or those you speak, sing, write or withhold all words have power and carry an energetic vibration….

On waking or sleeping the words you think or say aloud often set the tone for your day or the depth of your sleep.  What you say in haste without thinking may cut someone to the core and the words you say with love stick in your nearest and dearest hearts and minds forever.

Once you have learnt the alphabet everything you read or hear is a combination of those twenty six letters and who would have thought those 26 letters could have such power?

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I’ve been thinking a lot about words recently as i’m in the process of writing my second book which by the way is a lot of words.

As well as my own dialogue i’ve been thinking about strangers words, communications from people I know, those shown on media or spoken on TV as well as listening to the words of those whom I esteem to.  The impact words have on us is huge.  The emotional charge of what we hear and speak as well as the physiological feelings experienced when we hear words of criticism or words of praise can last a lifetime and indeed create limiting beliefs based on the meanings we have placed on the words we have heard.

You may have heard about the experiment carried out by Dr Masaru Emoto on Water Molecule Experiment which indicates words are very much alive and contain both positive and negative energy vibration.

On searching for a suitable graphic to post with this blog typing in the search engine ‘words’, I was able to select graphics on stress, anxiety, anger, terrorism, fear, hate and love, (it was interesting to note my own thought reaction and physical response on viewing) you can guess where my focus was when you see this post.

Whatever we feel in any given moment, guaranteed is a result of a thought related to a new experience or one in which we have felt this way before.  Words, just like energy attract.  If we feel loved, appreciated, accepted and respected in any given moment because of what someone has said it’s likely the love bucket and good feeling file starts to overflow.   If words are said in anger it’s likely our filing cabinet or hard drive of all the times someone has shown anger will do a quick search and pull up all the files before we can say ‘hey presto!’ we are down the swanny without a paddle thinking about all the injustices in the world.

So..today and every day, reach for the words which give you a higher feeling thought and keep going from there.  Raise your vibration using those 26 little letters and take your focus to joy, love, happiness, calm, contentment and connection.  Talking of which, thank you for connecting with me here today.

Oh and remember the words you think are like having a bad case of the farts, if you are angry everyone gets a stink of it and the same way if your vibration is on joy (even though they don’t really smell of roses) you might find the seat next to you on the tube is always taken, random people talk to you and smile, you make friends easily and the right circumstances and people show up in your life.

Words have power!  Choose them wisely.

From my heart to yours with love x

ohh…and here just for you feel free to download the free chapter on Beliefs from my first book Find YOU, Find LOVE, simply add your details to the pop up box which loads after a few seconds and begin exploring where your limiting beliefs  and self-sabotage comes from.  Chances are they don’t even belong to you but based on the words spoken to you from way back when.

 

13 Sep

Every Day An Anniversary

Every day is an anniversary of some other day.

Some say time is immeasurable and doesn’t exist though as you’re sitting there right now reading this, let’s celebrate the fact you are alive and very much present in this time and space.  Whether you’re reading this on your phone on the tube, from home on your PC or tablet, or if you’re following this page and reading in your email today is your day and the anniversary of you showing up day after day and wouldn’t you agree that’s worth a celebratory high five, bow, shimmy or even a glass of fizz.

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Just today it made me realise how quickly time passes.  My dad has been married to my stepmother for 30 years today also on this day 6 years ago my lovely neighbour Norma was laid to rest.  This time last year I was in hospital awaiting an operation, I was also launching my first book woo hoo!

September happens to be one of my favourite months as the leaves start to change colour and horse chestnuts (conkers) are getting themselves ready for picking and a conker fight or two.

So today and every day reflect on your past and ponder the happy anniversaries and also the anniversaries of hardships you have overcome, achievements made, projects completed, operations you’ve survived, hills you’ve climbed, risks taken, words spoken, commitments made and acknowledge although time stands still apparently for no man (or woman come to that) just take a moment to acknowledge every day is the anniversary of some other day.

If you find yourself remembering anniversaries with sadness, regret, anger or love, welcome all your emotions, it shows you, you are alive and that you’ve lived and loved.  Feel what you need to feel and know this day too will pass as will tomorrow and the next day too.

Every day may not be a good day but there will be something good in every day…look for it, seek it, find it!

Make every day a day to remember and make time to celebrate you!

Happy Anniversary – You are amazing!

 

29 Aug

The Best of Friends

When you think of the word friend or friendship who or what comes to mind?

I love using a Thesaurus and found the following meanings in terms of friendship and the components of what we might mutually bring to a relationship with friends.  Reading through how many of these statements resonate with you and the friendships you’re blessed with?

  • accord
  • affection
  • agreement
  • closeness
  • devotion
  • harmony
  • intimacy
  • love
  • rapport
  • understanding
  • affinity
  • amiability
  • company
  • consideration
  • empathy
  • fondness
  • friendliness
  • sodality

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I don’t know about you but I personally have the best of friends and have known many of them for over 35 years, oh boy, that makes me feel a little old though all things considered my friendships have lasted longer than my relationships.

Friends come in all shapes and sizes, nationalities, ages, sexes with common goals and aims or opposing opinions.  I can understand the term ‘friends for life’ as so many of us are blessed with life long friendships from the day we form the friendship until the day we die, so many wonderful experiences can be shared with friends.

I invite you to take a moment today to honour your friendships and acknowledge them in some way, whether it be a call,  meeting up, sending a greeting by social media or indeed sharing this blog post just to say ‘thank you for being my friend.’

It’s often our friends who are there for us in our darkest hours and who are the first to want to celebrate our successes.

So on that note to all my wonderful friends, I love you, thank you for being in my life, you are the best!

 

 

 

22 Aug

EFT isn’t Just for Olympians

If you’re new to EFT you might be wondering what the E, the F and the T stand for.  Never one to disappointment EFT is short for Emotional Freedom Technique or in other words tapping your way to happiness, success and living a joy filled life.

In recent footage of The 2016 Rio Olympics fellow energists, EFT practitioners and those who use EFT were delighted to see what appears to be EFT used by olympian and athlete Brain Taplin preparing for the 400m sprint at the Rio Olympics.  I just love his surname as it has the word ‘tap’ in it.

Now whether Brain was tapping into his inner resources to ‘go faster’, tapping for confidence or tapping away anxiety (I imagine there is a lot of anxiety of you are completing at the olympics) the good news is whatever he was tapping on, he won his race, woo hoo.  Well done Brian and let’s have a shout out for EFT while we’re at it!

You can see Brian tapping on some of the EFT tapping points in this footage from The Guild of Energists right here

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Now EFT isn’t just for olympians, for sure many famous people use EFT as do your everyday housewives, school children, police officers, nurses, teachers, builders, bakers and candlestick makers.  People just like you are enjoying the benefits of improved health, less stress, more contentment and basically having a technique that puts you in control of any situation which may previously have been one for concern.

EFT is easy to pick up and use in the moment or as part of your daily well being routine.

Ready to find out more about EFT tapping :

Karl Dawson offers UK based trainings and has written two amazing books: Matrix Reimprinting Using EFT: Rewrite Your Past, Transform Your Future and Transform Your Beliefs Transform Your Life: EFT Tapping Using  and Matrix Reimprinting

Gary Craig creator of EFT offers a whole host of information here 

Silvia Hartmann and The Guild of Energists provides much research if the area of EFT and energy.

And of course there’s little old me.  If you’re interested in finding out more about this technique and applying it in all areas of your life you can do so here

My testimony to EFT is having more confidence, leaving a day job and now doing the work I love, improved assertiveness, happier relationships, business success oh, and it’s helped me to write two books.  EFT is great for writer’s block or just having the confidence to share your message and get yourself out there.  Find YOU, Find LOVE is my first book which showcases EFT, my second will be out later on this year.  It’s all about conflicting mother-daughter relationships and how to transform the relationship with your mother using EFT.  I will keep you posted on here as to availability when it goes live.

Meanwhile if it’s just getting to work on time, tapping before an important meeting, tapping because you have a growing workload which seem to be multiplying or tapping simply to have a fantastic day EFT sets you free!  Brian Taplin is a classic example of tapping your way to success.

Happy Monday….tap your way to happiness

 

 

25 Jan

The Voice of the Heart

How often do you truly connect in with your heart?

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Do you find your head ruling your heart rather than the other way round?  If so read my blog ‘get out of your head and into your heart‘ 

It’s possible to increase heart centre connection using the exercise below and also the ones included here 

Heart Based Practical Exercise: The voice of the heart

Copy out or read aloud the following statements and include your positive heartfelt endings

 
• I experience love when I…..

 
• When I think about love I feel it in my (name the area of your body where you feel the energy of love. This might be somewhere else in addition to your heart)…..

 
• I have learnt to love and take care of myself by…..

 
• Love and heart focused connection fills up so much of my time that I forget to….

 
• I can…..

 
• My heart is full of love because I choose to…..

 
• The inner core of my being recognises love through…..

 
• This is my chance to…..

 
• When I listen to my heart it tells me…..

 
• I respect myself totally because…..

 
• I’m determined to…..

 
• I’m so happy that I now choose…..

 
• I am blessed to experience heart connection because…..

 
• I will…..

 
• I am strong enough to…..

 
• Love is now a part of me and I vow to…..

 
• I’m certain that I can…..

 
• I promise to…..

 
• This is my opportunity to…..

 
• It is my mission to…..because…..

 
• I am choosing to make the rest of my life…..

 
• I love myself unconditionally exactly as I am and in doing so I…..

 

Notice what changes in you day, week and month ahead when you get into the space of love and heart centred connection.

 

One love, one heart, one destiny – Bob Marley
When you’re ready to take the next step in exploring your hearts needs to support you in achieving your personal and business goals. I offer a range of support programmes. www.wendyfry.com  for love and relationship support and www.bepositive.me.uk for general therapeutic support.

18 Jan

PAUSE for Positive Change

We all have the same amount of hours in the day though I know many of you might wish you had more time to either get through your ‘In Tray’, deal with the hundreds of daily emails or simply want more time to connect with your family and friends.

I need to let you know, the secret of success is…Less is more!

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Working yourself into the ground, running on empty and worrying about everything creates stress.

Taking just a few minutes out of your day, brings you back into balance.  Getting you out of your head and into your heart.  By slowing down our thoughts, remembering to breathe and taking a moment to pause, will allow you to de-stress, do more and have time for fun stuff too.

Now is the perfect time to PAUSE and connect with your heart space Any time you find yourself going into your head, pause and use heart centred breathing.

Re-connecting with your heart space will support you in remembering your:

 
Passion

Ability

Uniqueness

Sense of Self

Energy of Love

 
Allow the pause to reach your heart space, breathe deeply and allow yourself to fully connect in love.  Feel that love and connection growing and expanding, filling up not only your physical body with beautiful energy.

Blast out that vibrant energy from your heart out into The Universe.

Create a positive ripple of heart connection across the planet.

Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to believe that you do great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you will know when you’ve found it – Steve Jobs

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Heart Based Exercise: Making your future the best it can be

I encourage you to reflect on the following points, to make your future the best it can be. Ask yourself:

 
• What do I need to stop doing that holds me back from having a more heart centred connection with myself and others?
• What do I need to start doing to allow my heart to open fully?
• What can I commit to right now that will allow for a more heart centred approach to life and living?
Heart Based Exercise (apply daily as many of these heart centred self care choices as you possible)

I have listed below some activities that will aid you in being more loving to yourself and making time for you to be with you. What can you choose from these examples that will make you feel pampered, cherished and loved and what other ways can you find to love you?

 
Affirmations – starting and ending the day with positive affirmations while connection from your heart will aid towards general well-being creating balance and positive energy flow.

 
Being out in nature – connecting to nature is very restorative and reduces mental fatigue. It is both healing and cleansing, being out in fresh air and green spaces restoring one’s emotional health and physical wellbeing on many different levels.

 
Complementary Therapies – there are some wonderful therapies that may make you feel relaxed and at peace with yourself – for example massage, Reiki, HeartMath Coherence and Reflexology, as well as EFT are all are treatments which aid in the release of built up emotions in the emotional and physical body whilst also easing the mind.

 
Eating well – choosing healthy foods that you enjoy and which are natural and energising are an important part of looking after you and maintaining a healthy heart. Prepare for yourself delicious meals and treats with love and care. Use beautiful china to eat and drink from. Make eating a beautiful ritual where you honour your body and your health.

 

Exercise – Any form of exercise, whether it’s walking, cycling, swimming, aerobics, dancing or using a trampoline will release endorphins (the ‘happy’ hormone) into your body. Laughter Yoga if you haven’t yet discovered it is perfect for a lasting happiness effect. Exercise can make you feel energised, positive and confident and is also great for toning and shaping as well as pumping blood around the heart. Be sure to have some form of exercise in your daily routine and to build up gradually listening to your body at all times.

 

Gratitude – Practising daily gratitude has so many benefits.  Read this wonderful article by Monica Cafferky, freelance journalist  ‘How Writing a Daily Gratitude Diary Changed Our Lives’  I’m pleased to have been interviewed for this article and share with you how the attitude of gratitude changed me life in the Daily Express.

 

Rest and relaxation – down time such as listening to music, reading, taking a nap or making sure you have plenty of sleep when you need it, is a very loving way to look after yourself and your heart.

 

Meditation – You may also find meditation helps you to relax after a busy day or, as part of a daily morning ritual. Check out  Five Minute Meditations by Caroline Maidment which I highly recommend. Meditation lowers the heart rate and boosts immunity feeding the body with nutrients and oxygen.

 

Self care – such as taking luxurious baths with scented oils, candles burning and using wonderful body moisturisers and having a pamper, generally all helps one’s body to feel loved and cared for. Body brushing increases lymphatic flow through the body towards the heart. Choosing carefully the outfit you will wear for the day ahead, how you style your hair and if you wear make-up, taking care to apply and wear the colours that love you are all an important part of you showing yourself love, attention and care.

 

When you are kind and loving towards yourself connecting from your heart you act from a place of self love, it’s possible to expand, connect, amplify, magnetise and bring balance to your life.  Your thought processes change and you may find yourself being more positive about life in general, as you operate more from heart focused awareness.

It is beautiful to express love and even more beautiful to feel it – Dejan Stoganovic

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When you’re ready to take the next step and make your future the best it can be contact me for love and relationship support at www.wendyfry.com or for general therapeutic support at www.bepositive.me.uk email: info@wendyfry.com.

I work over Skype and also in person from my practice in Surrey offering a range of personal support programmes, workshops and VIP Days.

Remember to PAUSE, you’d be surprised what you find in the gap! 

17 Jan

One True Thing

Nothing in my experience compares to the unique connection and bond we experience with our pets.

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An unspoken mutual agreement is made up of respect, caring and unconditional love.

Sensitive to each others needs and there for each other through all seasons our pets show us how to nurture in completeness, how to relax and how to enjoy simple pleasures.

Whether it be teaching us to take time out and sit in a sunny spot, enjoy the fresh air and freedom of walking or running in a park or to simply enjoy a cool drink of water we can learn so much from our furry friends.

Our pets allow us to be all of who we are, without judgement. I know many people who have conversations with their pets and would not dream of talking this way to others for fear of ridicule.

All creatures great and small put us in touch with the child like part of ourselves, where we can be lovely dovey,  soft and fluffy or airy fairy.

We find a place within ourselves, with their aid  where we roll about in glee or simply find stillness and peace within.  They teach us how to connect with our inner child, to laugh, to play or simply be.

Blessed are we who have the love of pets.

Whether your pet is sitting with you right now or is with you in spirit.  One true thing is your love for each other will live on in your hearts forever.

This blog is in loving memory of my neighbours cat Mac, who had a fondness for rubbing his face on my plants, who always came to see me when I put rubbish out or worked in the garden.  I’ve spent the last six years watching Mac grow up from a fluffy, scrawny kitten into a magnificent and beautiful young man.

I know I will miss him though I thank him for showing me unconditional love.

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Pictures included are not of Mac though represent all our beautiful pets the world over.

 

 

 

11 Jan

Raising Your Love Vibration

We all need love and heart centred connection….

Since we were mere babies, to be loved, nurtured and connected with others is a natural human need inbuilt from our earliest years.

As adults, we no longer need to be reliant to find love and connection from the outside sources; we can meet our own needs independently by going into our hearts.

If you need a little more information about heart connection see my previous blog Get Out of Your Head and into Your Heart 

Heart Based Exercise: Raising Your Love Vibration- connecting with your heart space

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You can use this exercise in the written sense, writing down your answers or simply use as a visual exercise if you prefer.

Think about a dial with -10 being the lowest love score, 0 being neutral and +10 being at its highest rate of heart connection

How high is your heart connection dial right now?
• If your dial is anything less than a + 10 what do you need to start doing, stop doing or do differently to get it to a +10?
• How will your life change when you connecting with your heart space from a +10?
• What things do you love about life/yourself/others when you connect from the heart? (keep adding to that list so that you have a growing list of things to love and appreciate about yourself)
• What memories do you have of giving and receiving love?
• Remember how giving and receiving love felt, what you saw, heard and experienced, how was this achieved when you openly gave and received love through your heart?
• How can you be more loving towards yourself and others?
• What would happen if you accepted, allowed and welcomed more love into your life?
• How would your day change if you filtered for and looked for all the loving experiences you could find through heart centred awareness?
• How would your life change if you operated more from your heart and said yes to love for now and for always?

 

Reflect on your answers and notice where you might be falling a little short in the love vibration department.  If you need some extra help read my previous blog post Creating Possibilities through Heart Centred Connection 

The moment you surrender to love and allow it to lead you to exactly where your soul wants it to go, you will have no difficulty – Neal Donald Walsch

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Practical Exercise: Increasing Raising your love vibration

Use the following statements in addition to the prior exercise, either writing your answers  after the gaps, visualising the process or reading the statements aloud and ending in your own words.
Connecting with my heart I know….

Being more heart centred changes my life because….

I love how it feels when…..

I love knowing…..

It makes me feel so good that…..

I love seeing myself…..

I enjoy…..

I’m excited at the thought of…..

I love being…..

I’m delighted that….

I appreciate….

It feels so good to be….

I’m so happy that….

When you raise your love vibration through heart centred connection,  you feel differently about yourself and your future. When you can change your mind set about what is possible rather than what is impossible this changes your energetic vibration, try it and see.

Wherever you go, go with all your heart – Confucius

When you’re ready to work with me please do make contact at info@wendyfry.com to explore the range of tools and techniques I can share with you, Helping You to help Yourself!

Love and Relationship Support Programmes www.wendyfry.com

General Therapeutic Support www.bepositive.me.uk