31 Mar

Mind & Body Connected As One

Your mind and body react in a continuous flow of information endlessly affecting and Influencing one and other. Every thought you think affects your body (physiology) and emotions. Likewise every physical action affects your thinking and your mood. Thoughts can create heighten stress, sadness, depression as well as intensify feelings of joy, happiness and love.

I wish to encourage you to be aware from this moment on how your mind body connection works. Being aware of this connection will help you to manage how your mind and body influence each other. Being aware of your thoughts for even just a few minutes each day is a start.

At the end of each day reflect on the day you have experienced and ask yourself:

  • What have I been focusing on (have my thoughts been in the past, present or future?)
  • How have I been talking to myself for the last hour or two?
  • Have I been talking to myself in a kindly way or a critical way?
  • What images have I been replaying in my mind?
  • Have I been thinking about the future negatively or positively?

Checking in with yourself as often as possible and monitoring your thoughts will serve you well. When you manage your thinking to that which is more positive or you allow your body to experience positive things such as exercise, relaxation and good health the mind body connection improves tenfold.

This information is from chapter 3 ‘EFT at Your Fingertips’ from my forthcoming book Find YOU Find LOVE – Get to the heart of love and relationships using EFT.  This section explains energy psychology and how thoughts act as energy vibrations

23 Mar

The Past is Over…

The past is over.  It’s gone.  It’s history.  Only your thinking keeps these negative experiences alive.

  • What would it be like for you to move on from the past? 
  • How would your life change? 
  • What opportunities might come your way?
  • What about love? 
  • What about relationships? 
  • How might your relationships be different if you chose right now to put the past behind you? 

You have the power to change your thoughts and your relationships.  You are the driving force to use your past to work for you not against you.  My forthcoming book Find YOU Find LOVE will guide you through specific processes that will transform your life and transform love.

16 Mar

What a tangled web we weave

Some of you may remember reading a children’s story book called Charlotte’s Web by EB White, a classic line from this book is ‘what a tangled web we weave’.

In love and relationships we weave a complicated web of stories about love and relationships based on beliefs, perceptions, judgements, conditions and the need for approval and acceptance.   We often hand over our responsibility of being loved to another person (acting as a child would wanting our needs to be met by another) and that in itself can put huge pressure on the relationship.  Not only that we lose a sense of our inner selves and give up on taking self responsibility to fulfil our own needs.  It often becomes an obsession to get our needs met and can seem like life and death if they are not.

As children growing up it is natural for us to look towards our caregivers and parents to cater to our every whim to seek for and be rewarded with love, approval, acceptance and nurturing, though as adults that is our personal responsibility, it’s no longer appropriate to look outside of ourselves for these things or to demand them in a relationship.

It is no longer appropriate to act from that ‘little me’ place. Coming across as the needy baby or child when you are an adult.  In fact it complicates things if we are constantly clingy, needy and wanting to be ‘filled up’ with the love, approval, acceptance or attention from another.

In my forthcoming book Find YOU Find LOVE, using The Spotlight Process and EFT you will gain insight and clarity into why your love relationships may not have been as loving or lasting as you would like them to be.

When we truly grow up and take responsibility (response-ability) responding to our own needs rather than looking to others to respond to and look after us,  our lives can change dramatically and we have the capacity to totally transform them.


12 Mar

So Many Ways to Experience Love

How do you experience love?

There are so many ways to experience love.  One way of experiencing love is to be In the moment.  In love with loving where you’re at.  Enjoying the feeling of joy and love flow through you with ease.  Experiencing love as an essence – as a feeling not a thing.  Love at the very heart of your being and not dependent on a person or an outcome.

Not all love is extrinsic (we put love outside of ourselves as if it’s a thing that can fill up a void, a whole, a need) Indeed love is intrinsic, we have inside of ourselves everything we could ever need and more.

How do you yourself experience love?

Self Love?

Love of another (giving or receiving)?

Love of family?

Love of a pet?

Love of your work/vocation?

Love of nature/gardening?

Love of knowledge?

Love of music?

Love of people?

Love of a faith/religion?

Love of a hobby?

Love of exercise?

Love of reading or writing?

Love of stillness/meditation?

Self Love is the greatest love of all.  Without self love we cannot love another or experience receiving love.  By loving and caring for ourselves we show others that it’s ok for them to love and care for themselves too.

What if the only resolution you ever made was to love yourself more (Cheryl Richardson)

What could you to today to be more loving towards yourself?


09 Mar

When I Let Go Of Being Me…

then I let go of who I might become.

How many of you reading this have stopped being you at some point in your life?

Have you tried to please another person by being who you think they want you to be?

Have you ever not spoken up for fear of not being approved of or judged?

Have you ever played small to keep the peace?

Have you behaved differently to gain love and acceptance?

Have you dressed differently to please another person?

Stopped a specific hobby or interest as it didn’t fit the other person’s ideal?

Have you ever doubted your self worth based on another person’s comments or actions?

Take just a moment to think about the parts of yourself that you are denying.  When and where did you stop being you?  What happened in your life to make you think that being you was unacceptable, unlovable?  What’s the priced you’ve paid or are currently paying by not being you?

I have decided that if someone doesn’t accept all of me and who I am then that doesn’t mean I have to stop being me.  I have learnt the hard way what’s it’s like to loose my sense of identity, wholeness, uniqueness and I continued to reject myself as unworthy, unlovable and flawed until I learnt it’s ok to be me.  Since I woke up to that fact ”It’s ok to be me”, my life has changed dramatically and so many new and wonderful opportunities are coming my way.

Please listen and really hear this.  Who you are is amazing, loveable, beautiful, unique, special and wonderful.  If you have any doubt about that or feel that you don’t know how to get your mojo back then my forthcoming book Find YOU Find LOVE will gently guide you, support you and help you to identify where the perception of rejection and being unlovable came from and together we will work through that so that you can release the past and create a life full of love.

It’s time to transform into that wonderful butterfly that you are.  Life is for living, life is for loving, enjoy every moment!


02 Mar

Where have you been shining your light?

I’d like you to imagine that you have a torch in your hands right now.  That torch can be directed into the past, into the future or in this present moment.

If you have been directing your beam of focus towards the pain and disappointments from the past, this is what you see. If you have been shining your light on failed relationships and lack of love, this is what you may attract in the future. If you have been pointing the light on being alone, lonely and loneliness this only magnifies the feelings associated with being alone.

So where have you been shining your light?

It’s time to think about where you have been directing your light and how that influences your life right now, what has been the cost of focusing on the negative?  What have you missed out on? What have you given up on? What do you want instead?

In my forthcoming book Find YOU Find LOVE  I will support you to find solutions to your love and relationship problems so that you can clear the past  and let go of those unwanted emotions that hold you back from getting to the heart of love and relationships.

By shining your light in the moment, accepting who you are completely as a loving and loveable person, this will offer you a ray of hope bringing clarity and brightness to your future so that you truly sparkle and dazzle every day, warm in the glow of love.

When you are ready to direct your beam to the future –  bring to mind all that is possible, all that is achievable, all that is love and then some.  When you become open to receiving love, open to being loving, eating, breathing, living and sleeping love your light will illuminate only that.

Think about the end result and what you want, never falter.   Learn from the past to make your future one heck of a light show, it’s going to be spectacular.

The processes to clear the past will be featured in my forthcoming book Find YOU Find LOVE